(Day 13) On Missing People

College is an odd concept. It gives you a life. It gives you friends. You build up a network of people to get dinner with and places to be on a Friday night. But, then, in the summer, they take it all away from you. They’re saying, “Here’s a taste of life, now go home.”

Meeting new people ranks up there with adrenaline rushes and cookies. Creating a new life is paint-on pottery in the best way possible, but missing people is normal. I miss my friends. 

Last semester, I took a reporting class. After every class, three classmates and I would always go do something. Get smoothies from a place called Brazila on 3rd street and Broadway or gelato from Amarino’s on University, or even the strongest espresso you’ll ever swallow at Columbe on 4th. I wouldn’t trade those afternoons for the world. The talks about our futures and solving the problems of sexism, they’ll stay with me forever. 

Then there are the people you send smiley faces to about a thousand times per day from one thousand miles away. You can skype with them whenever for however long, but it’s never the same as looking at each other, right eye, then left eye, and the silences  always resemble a note that trails off the piano keys. 
You can always find more people, great people, new people. But then there will always be people that you could live without, but, really, you’d rather not live without them. 

It scares me that relationships can fade just because of time changes and coordination problems. I’ve seen it happen to others. I’ve had it happen to me with the friends I made at Yale during a summer session in high school. I still see them on Facebook and my jaw locks up when I look at who they’ve become without me and who I’ve become without them. Facebook is going to be really odd when I’m 40…

Some days I fixate on one person that I miss, and wonder if they think of me. The next day I fixate on some other one person. Some days I fixate on no one in particular, but just people. But what does in matter really? In the fall, college will waltz back up to me and say,

“Here’s your life back. Enjoy it while it lasts.”


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