One Day, Last Summer

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One day, last summer, I was riding the Long Island Railroad back to my Aunt’s house from a training day for an internship. I felt like I was going to bleed out through the blisters on my feet and my entire body was throbbing like I had run a marathon. So, I put in my earphones and watched a woman put on her makeup while riding the train.

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How to Get Ready for a Date (satire)

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*disclaimer: not all girls get ready like this, but you’d be kidding yourself if you said you didn’t do it at least once in your life*

In two hours, you’ll have one hour left before you have to meet him at that bar or that coffee shop down the street. So you should leave yourself an hour for hair and makeup, an hour to decide on an outfit, half an hour to worry, and thirty extra minutes in case something dire happens.

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